Everyday phrases viewed literally
Ben Skipworth
Issue date: 11/19/09 Section: Opinion
I never seem to have a topic pre-determined when it comes time to write my editorials. This week the muse of my inspiration seemed to stumble upon me.
Ryan Hodgin, this is for you. Usually on Tuesday afternoons I go to Matt Barnes' house and record. If you're reading this and you don't know whom he is, he's been called the Timbaland of our generation.
On most occasions, we sit around, record or make up "bro names." Most of my friends do this. In some instances, Parker has even been known to toss a few around. So far we've come up with Bro Biden, Teddy Broski, Kimbro Slice, Teddy Brosevelt and although losing popularity, Bro the Plumber. Often times it's just as easy to substitute bro in for Joe. Such as: Bro Biden, G.I. Bro (I think I just coined that one), Bro Namath, and Bro Paterno.
Normally, I would find that the name making alone would inspire me, however; it was something that Matt said that sent me on a warpath. I asked Matt where his habitually unreliable brother Chris was. His reply was, "I don't know. He probably just can't wake his butt up."
Oh yeah, that reminds me of a time the exact same thing happened to me. Silly Ben, always scheduling 8 A.M. classes. I woke up, completely conscious of everything around me. I attempted to get up, honest I did.
For some unforeseen reason, my butt literally would not wake up. I was like, "Butt get up!"
To my sudden surprise and amusement, it did not comply.
After an awkward struggle with my own posterior, I slapped it repeatedly. Then I remembered it was nearly calloused from disciplinary action I had received as a child. After several slaps, I muscled up enough strengthto roll over. My hiney seemed to resemble that of a baboon. I struggled, endured, and eventually gave in. It was just too much.
Fortunately for me, Mrs. Garfrerick didn't take roll. Lucky me right? Just one line led me to think about what would happen if we actually took some phrases we use in everyday language literally.
We so commonly use the phrase, "Aw man, it tasted like crap," yet; do we know this from experience? It's a very harrowing thought if you just ponder on that for a little bit.
Sometimes we just get so caught up in life that we don't even realize what we're saying. I use several phrases a lot and since my Reading Rainbro made me aware of this, I've tried to think a little more cautiously.
If any of you readers out there have good "bro phrases" don't hesitate to let me in on them.
So, thank you for taking time out of your day to read my article. Now go break a leg!
Ryan Hodgin, this is for you. Usually on Tuesday afternoons I go to Matt Barnes' house and record. If you're reading this and you don't know whom he is, he's been called the Timbaland of our generation.
On most occasions, we sit around, record or make up "bro names." Most of my friends do this. In some instances, Parker has even been known to toss a few around. So far we've come up with Bro Biden, Teddy Broski, Kimbro Slice, Teddy Brosevelt and although losing popularity, Bro the Plumber. Often times it's just as easy to substitute bro in for Joe. Such as: Bro Biden, G.I. Bro (I think I just coined that one), Bro Namath, and Bro Paterno.
Normally, I would find that the name making alone would inspire me, however; it was something that Matt said that sent me on a warpath. I asked Matt where his habitually unreliable brother Chris was. His reply was, "I don't know. He probably just can't wake his butt up."
Oh yeah, that reminds me of a time the exact same thing happened to me. Silly Ben, always scheduling 8 A.M. classes. I woke up, completely conscious of everything around me. I attempted to get up, honest I did.
For some unforeseen reason, my butt literally would not wake up. I was like, "Butt get up!"
To my sudden surprise and amusement, it did not comply.
After an awkward struggle with my own posterior, I slapped it repeatedly. Then I remembered it was nearly calloused from disciplinary action I had received as a child. After several slaps, I muscled up enough strengthto roll over. My hiney seemed to resemble that of a baboon. I struggled, endured, and eventually gave in. It was just too much.
Fortunately for me, Mrs. Garfrerick didn't take roll. Lucky me right? Just one line led me to think about what would happen if we actually took some phrases we use in everyday language literally.
We so commonly use the phrase, "Aw man, it tasted like crap," yet; do we know this from experience? It's a very harrowing thought if you just ponder on that for a little bit.
Sometimes we just get so caught up in life that we don't even realize what we're saying. I use several phrases a lot and since my Reading Rainbro made me aware of this, I've tried to think a little more cautiously.
If any of you readers out there have good "bro phrases" don't hesitate to let me in on them.
So, thank you for taking time out of your day to read my article. Now go break a leg!
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