What do men's rights groups protest?
Scot Beard
Issue date: 4/15/04 Section: Viewpoints
People never cease to amaze me. There is always someone out in the world who does something stupid, or something that makes no sense to me.
With my extremely cynical nature, it is hard to surprise me with someone's goofiness. That is why I am writing this. I found a subject that I still cannot believe. It came to my attention while doing a book review for a class.
The book was about the portrayal of women and minorities in advertising. The chapter on women talked about women being treated as sex objects or as airheads. Near the end, the author wrote about the recent trend of role reversal in advertising. You know, the Calvin Klein ads where men are the sex objects, or the beer ads where guys are all bumbling buffoons.
Now, here is the good part. There are people protesting these ads. Are they Victoria's Secret models angered that the guys are taking over their territory? Or, is it stupid people who are afraid of being associated with alcoholics? No, the protests are coming from men's rights groups.
Yes, you read the last sentence correctly-MEN'S RIGHTS GROUPS.
What? Why do we need men's rights groups? Have men become so helpless they can't solve their own problems? Are we really that repressed? How did we get to this point?
Before I go any further, let me clarify something. I do, in some ways, represent the stereotypical male in the following ways: 1. I belch and fart when I feel like it because it feels good, 2. I watch football and hockey to satisfy my primal urges for violence, 3. I eat fatty foods because they taste good, and finally 4. I drink beer, because it is the best way to get drunk,-after Jack Daniel's.
Therefore, I feel the need to stick up for my brethren. The fact such a group exists is a slap in the face of masculinity. So, let me answer the questions asked a few paragraphs ago.
Why do we need men's rights groups? We don't; men can handle problems on their own. These groups were probably started as a joke to show that the concept of interest groups has gone too far. I can only think of one men's rights group that has served a useful function. National Organization of Men Against Amazonian Masterhood, or No MA'AM from the television show Married With Children.
Have men become so helpless they can't solve their own problems? No, but we are getting there fast. The emasculation process began years ago when we started listening to our girlfriends' advice on how to dress. Trust me guys, you don't have to be stylish to get women. If you did, your distant caveman relatives never would have mated and none of us would be here. If you dress yourself, you'll respect yourself. If you respect yourself, you will fight your own battles, eliminating the need for men's rights groups.
Are we really that repressed? Again, no, but we are getting close. Besides, women are still not treated equally in the United States, and in some areas of the world they are repressed. This raises another question, would it hurt us too much to walk a mile in their shoes? Hell yeah, it would! Many women have problems balancing in high heels, and they are small and dainty. I am roughly six feet tall, and bulky. Can you imagine me in high heels? Well, don't. I would never cross dress. Seriously, look at the photo at the top of this article; I would be a lousy drag queen. I've got too much facial hair.
How did we get to this point? That is not an important question. The important question is, how do we get away from this point? Just as with any support group, there are some steps to follow.
First, admit there is a problem. Second, have a beer. Next, watch some sports. It doesn't matter what sport, just as long as there is sweat and competition. Fourth, repeat step two. After that, talk to another man. Don't talk about the things your girlfriend says you should talk about. Talk about guy things such as the Three Stooges, sports, naked women, anything but emotions and relationships. Finally, step six-have another beer and take a nap.
Guys, by following the above steps at least once a week, you can regain your masculinity. That is what is needed for us to be manly again. You don't have to do it by yourself, either-guys used to get in groups and do this stuff all the time. It was called poker night.
Now, that was a good group that would always take up for their fellow men.
I am roughly six feet tall, and bulky. Can you imagine me in high heels?
